The Do's and Don'ts of Saying 'Thank You'
You already know you’re supposed to send hand-written thank-you notes for all wedding gifts, but what exactly are you supposed to say?
Begin by addressing everyone in the family whom you invited, by name, and then either thank the guest(s) for sharing your day with you or telling those who could not make it that you missed them and hope to see them soon, says Sharon Naylor, best-selling author of more than 35 wedding books including “The Essential Guide to Wedding Etiquette” (Sourcebooks Casablanca, 2005).
Next, include a few sentences in which you thank the guest for the specific gift, indicating what you especially like about it and what you might do with it, says Elise Mac Adam, author of “Something New: Wedding Etiquette for Rule Breakers, Traditionalists, and Everyone In Between” (Simon Spotlight Entertainment, 2008). For example, “Thank you so much for the wok cookbook. We’ve been meaning to get more creative in the kitchen, and this is really inspiring!”
If the gift happens to be cash, acknowledge the gift and state what it will be used for, Mac Adam adds. For example, “We’re about to purchase our first home, and your generous present will help us make the down payment – thank you so much!”
Finally, close the card with “Love” for family and friends, and “With All Best Wishes” for parents’ colleagues and friends, and then aim to have both bride and groom sign the card in their own handwriting, says Naylor.
While it isn’t a requirement to send a thank-you note to guests who didn’t give you a gift but still traveled from far away to attend your event, it’s always a gracious gesture, says Mac Adam. Simply say something like “We’re so touched that you came all this way to share the most important day of our lives!”